Her name is Sasha....

I have a new foundlove for the (ahem...) "sport" of ice skating. That love is named Sasha Cohen.

What?...

I'm just saying...

(By the way I heard she was cute from a mutual friend. I mean really...do you think that I would actually watch womens ice skating. Now....mens ice skating.....SAILOR!!!)

You might be gay if.....(not that there is anything wrong with that)

Okay.

Two guys talking about yoga. Gay or not Gay?

Me being caught in the middle of the conversation just listening. Gay or not Gay.

Almost losing my composure and bust out laughing....priceless.

It's a part of life...THE BEEMER

My boss and I were having a discussion late yesterday afternoon. We were talking about certain people within our group that just purchased new cars. BMW's to be exact. That in itself is jim dandy. As individuals we can spend our money on whatever we want. Besides who am I to judge what vehicles people own. (I drive a freakin......"......." for crying out loud.

That's not the point of what I am trying to get at. It was how my boss mentioned that they got their BMW's. Not only did he do it in this fashion I notice that a lot of people talk this way.

"Yeah...(insert name) just got his BMW right before Christmas"
"(Insert name) got his new BMW"
"(insert name) is doing good. He has the wife the baby his job is going well and he just got his BMW"

I didn't know that BMW's could be referred to in the third person. Why does it seem like getting a BMW is like a part of life. Like something you do. Sort of a chain of events in life as follows:

- born into the world
- get educated
- have sex
- drink beer
- drink beer while having sex
- get a job
- get married
- have sex
- have a baby (due to having all of the sex)
- get a BEEMER
- get a house
- retire
- die

Is it me or does anyone else notice this? "uh yeah Jim Bob is doing good at work he just got his BMW"

What the fuck?

Chubby was his name....

So apparently there is this hit show that people all across the nation love. Dancing with the Stars. (I would link it but go figure...I forget how to do that. Yes..it's been that long) Anyway the wife started to watch this show so if that is what is on the tv that is what I watch. For those of you who do not get the premise the basis of the show is as follows:

1. Get a C-List "star" in the entertainment world. (apparently you can be a sibling of a start..that counts)
2. Get a struggling dancer trying to make in the in world as the next big "broadway star"
3. Pair them up and have them dance.
4. The nation calls up and votes to determine winners and losers.

That's pretty much it.

My tale is not to discuss the show in length. My tale is of self control.

From a males perspective I do have to applaud all of the male dancers on the show. Regardless if you are the star or not. Why applaud you ask? I applaud them for doing what they do with these women and not...."pop wood".

You know..
"salute the soldier"
"pop a chubby"

I could go on and on. Now for anyone who has seen the show there is a lot of touching, rubbing, grinding, holding, and did I mention the grinding?

I don't know about those guys but I get "going" when there is a shift in the wind let alone having to dance and rub up against someone like Stacey Kiebler. (Sure she is about 2 feet taller than I am but boy I would give her knee the best 30 seconds of it's life)

So to all of you guys on the show I salute you!!....uh I mean applaud you!!

Buddha the Millionaire....

Whenever there is a big pot of cash sitting in the lottery waiting to be won everyone starts to dream their wonderful dreams. Dreams of big houses, fast cars, quitting jobs, golfing all day and fast women..(what?).

Well apparently there will be no such fun in this man's life on this day. Dreams of not having to walk into work 15 minutes late everyday have been shattered. Dreams of buying a Mercedes built golf cart....shattered!!

Believe me the wife isn't happy. Thoughts of being a weathly stay at home mom has been shattered.

So since the powerball is now jacked up to a whooping 365 million we'll just have to dream our little dreams just a tad longer until the next drawing which is on Saturday.

The worst part of this is the rate of return of my inital investment is -0. Is that even possible? For each $5 I put in for the work pool I don't eat. So it's a no win situation. Not only do I lose $5 I can't buy lunch for that day.

A travesty. Just a plain damn travesty.

How easily they don't forget....

Wow. I appreciate the warm welcome back. I don't know why cause again I've never done this type of thing before. Honest.

But seriously It's nice to hear from a lot of you guys. Part of the reason why I started to do this again.

I think the time away from "blogging" was good for me. It has provided me with time to actually do things important...like work...spend time wth my wife....spend money.

My intent this time around is to try and make this my journal. Sure the occasional story about what I see in bathroom at work will be incorporated but for the most part a little journal. A place where I can go to escape for a bit. (Basically if I feel myself falling asleep at my dest I'll go drum up a quick entry just to keep my ass up)

So the moral of this? I am going to be a more Serious Buddha.......

and if you believe that...

Where has the time gone?

So I hear there is this new hip thing called a "Blog". Well who am I not to try something new and hip. I define the word "hip".

Since I've never done anything like this before I thought I'd give it a try and see what the big hoopla is all about.

Now keep in mind I'm a novice at this...I've never done anything like this before.

Now if you'll excuse me I have to run to the bathroom.